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Archive for January, 2014

Woman Wants Kidney Back from Cheating Husband

Thursday, January 30th, 2014

In 2009, Samantha Lamb, of the United Kingdom, age 41, donated one of her kidneys to her husband, Andy, to save his life.

A few years after the transplant operation, Andy said he was leaving her. She believes he was cheating on her. Now she wants her kidney back.

“I can’t ­believe he now has a second chance to live to see his grandchildren grow up,” Lamb told the Sunday People. “I would definitely go through the operation again –- but I wouldn’t give the kidney to him. I hate him. If I could I’d take it back and give it someone else.”

Religious Conservatives Have More Divorces

Friday, January 24th, 2014

A study by Jennifer Glass (University of Texas) and Philip Levchak (University of Iowa) finds that divorce rates are higher in states where more people believe the Bible to be literally true.

The study shows that even if you are not a religious conservative, you are still at higher risk of divorce by living in an area heavily populated by them.

You wouldn’t think that to be true because most religious conservatives frown upon divorce and religion is supposed to strengthen marriages.

The researchers suggest the answer may lie in the fact that religious conservatives have cultures that encourage early marriage and child bearing, two factors that are known to contribute to divorce.

The Divorce Lawyer’s Guide to Staying Married

Friday, January 17th, 2014

CHAPTER SEVEN-CELEBRATING YOUR SPOUSE

This week was my wife’s birthday. I got her a present, took her to dinner and wrote her a poem.

She let me know some time ago that she prefers a poem from me, no matter how bad, to a store-bought card, no matter how good.

I have some friends who say they have agreed with their spouses not to buy each other presents on birthdays and anniversaries.

That doesn’t work for me. I think it is important to celebrate your spouse and let him or her know how much you appreciate them.

Maintaining Your Dignity and Self-Respect During Divorce

Tuesday, January 14th, 2014

Guest post by Evelyn Crowther

It’s rare that the process of divorce doesn’t bring conflict. Even the most embittered among us can hardly fail to be impressed by those who manage to go their separate ways without resorting to arguments about property, children or finances; and have somehow managed their separation in a minimally destructive way. It’s all too easy to get caught up in angry exchanges, both verbal and legal as we fight for our rights. There’s often a desire to prove ourselves the victim of terrible injustices, and have our spouse seen as the perpetrator of all wrongs, but the way we go about the process can be extremely self-sabotaging.

Amid the haranguing about who did what to whom, who gets the house, the car and the blame, there’s one highly underrated trophy; worth more than money or property, or even the need to be right. It’s our dignity.

Coping with the process of divorce will likely be one of the most emotionally draining and stressful periods of a lifetime, with survivors are often left feeling as though we’ve been put through the hot wash cycle and hung out to dry. We can find that we’re left with a loss of self-respect and a great deal of embarrassment, when we realize that far too many aspects of our conflict have been made public and there is literally, nowhere to hide.

If we can resist the strong pull of self-disclosure we are more likely to maintain a sense of self-worth and come away with our heads held a little higher. We all need a trustworthy friend with whom to share our deepest worries, but do we really need ten and their hairdressers? Gossip can easily get out of hand, and before we know it, that comment we made in the heat of the moment, has resulted in previously supportive friends now taking the other side. It takes courage and integrity not to escalate a situation where we feel we are being wronged, but by engaging in public warfare we lose more than we bargain for. If we can resist the urge to bad mouth our partner, we maintain dignity and greater long term privacy, when we are starting to rebuild our lives. Don’t shout from the rooftops – leave the shouting to the lawyers.

Divorce Quotes

Monday, January 13th, 2014

“Compromise is the best and cheapest lawyer.”
– Robert Louis Stevenson

Controversial Film “Divorce Corp” Puts Family Law System on Trial

Thursday, January 9th, 2014

The film, narrated by Dr. Drew Pinsky is an expose type documentary of the $50 billion a year divorce industry.The filmmaker, Joseph Sorge, says he was inspired by his own divorce and custody battles. He uses interviews with lawyers, judges and others to try to show the failings of the family law legal system in America.

“It’s an unregulated mess in which children are ripped from their homes, insulting judges play God with parents’ lives, and unlicensed custody evaluators are more like extortionists,” according to Sorge. “Audiences will be surprised to learn just how damaging the family courts process is, people don’t realize a judge can just take the kids away because they don’t like you.”

January Is Divorce Month

Tuesday, January 7th, 2014

Many couples will file for divorce in January as they seek a new start in 2014.

Some troubled relationships come to a head at the end of the year.  The pressures of the holiday season build up. Or some couples may be able to cope with their marriage when they are at work, but being home together during the holidays is just too much.  There may also be pressure from a person they are having an affair with.

Financial issues, like spending,debt and taxes, may be considerations at year end, or some may be waiting for the year end bonus check to be deposited.  People may not look forward to spending another year with their spouse and resolve to call it quits. And an improving economy and housing market gives struggling couples more options in a divorce.

Whatever the reason, look for the number of divorces to rise this month.

Tax Planning for Divorce (Part 8-Retirement Funds)

Thursday, January 2nd, 2014

Guest Post by John Ellsworth, Esq.

Handle your retirement savings with care in a divorce as this is a very tricky area. If you cash out a 401(k) plan to give the money to your ex, for example, the IRS considers that a taxable distribution and you’ll be stuck paying the tax. The way to avoid this pitfall is to have the transfer made pursuant to a qualified domestic relations order (QDRO). Such an order gives your ex the right to the funds and relieves you of the tax burden.

 
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