What happens when an irresistible force meets an immovable object? A lawyer makes a settlement proposal for a divorce client. The other side sends back a counterproposal, which the client doesn’t like.
“What do you advise next?” asks the client.
“Send back another proposal with some concessions,” the lawyer says.
“What if I don’t want to make any concessions?”
“Then you are at an impasse.”
There are several ways to break an impasse.
(1) Litigation. The ultimate way is to have a judge decide. But this is expensive, time consuming and uncertain in outcome.
(2) Keep Talking. Explore other options to meet the needs of each party. I have been in negotiations where a creative idea just seems to fall out on the table in the conversation that had not been there before.
(3) Segment the Problem. Break the dispute down into separate smaller pieces and try to get agreements on one piece at a time until you have solved the whole problem.
(4) Bring in an Expert. You can bring in an expert to help break an impasse such as a therapist for issues involving children or a financial planner for issues involving money.
(5) Do Nothing. One option is to just do nothing until somebody blinks. Sometimes I have told the parties, “You are twenty thousand dollars apart and it will cost you each ten thousand dollars to litigate this case. Does anyone have any ideas?” Then I sit in silence for a minute, two minutes, sometimes ten minutes, until finally someone says, “Well I’ll split the difference if you will.”