Every once in a while, I get to use the word pettifogger in a letter. A pettifogger is someone who likes to bicker or quibble over trifles or unimportant matters.

I was responding to one of those lawyers who is dead right on the law, but dead wrong on being sensible.  In the middle of mediation his client has taken a small and unnecessary action that is permitted by law, but which will torpedo the good faith environment required for successful conflict resolution.

Now I am looking for a chance to use flibbertigibbet, which means a chattering or flighty, light headed person or gossip.

As I kiss my wife goodbye this morning, she says “Have a nice day.”

“I would,” I tell her, “but my enemies have other plans.”

I received another one of those letters that annoy me from opposing counsel today.  This one starts out by saying the wife is disappointed in the husband’s settlement offer.

It would surprise me one day to receive a letter that says opposing counsel’s client is delighted by my client’s settlement offer.

He might as well be telling me that it is raining outside or the sun is shining.  Thanks for the weather report, but what does that have to do with the business at hand?  The letter goes on for three pages of counterproposals, but I am already put in a too bad a mood by his beginning to view them with much favor.

That is why I always try to begin such letters with something like, “Thank you for your proposal.  It was a pleasure speaking with you.  I look forward to trying to settle this case with you.”  You get the idea.  People are more likely to settle cases with people they like than people they don’t like.